If you look into this cut tree, you can see spirals. The circles of this tree’s life, from beginning to end. Some show hard years with little growth, others prosperous and rich. This stump is a good metaphor for my life and some of the lessons I learned last weekend.
I attended (and helped coordinate) an inspiring workshop on Designing a Life with Lauralee Alben. Getting to the workshop was stressful. The preparation work involved, from shopping to copying, left me depleted. The process of the week caused me to fall in to old patterns I strive to stay away from: skipping exercise, sleeping too little, worrying, and rush rush rushing (remember what my New Year’s Resolutions were?).
But, as it would turn out, this was precisely the lesson I needed at the exact right moment. The main lesson I walked away with is that I don’t have to do everything and that I’m not holding the world alone on my shoulders. I choose to make myself a martyr. If I had not been so exhausted, I might not have heard this lesson.
Coming off this weekend I felt a tremendous weight lifted off my shoulders and experienced the feeling of lightness, almost joy. On Friday, all I felt was a heavy pile of work to do and no way to get out from under it. I had come so far in 48 hours.
This week, so far even more jam-packed than the last, has challenged the lessons I learned, but I breathe and try to remember that I can ask for help and that the world is a shared responsibility, not mine alone.
Lastly, I must share my life intention (as written this weekend): How can I inspire others to find self worth? The answer will develop over time.